It always amazes me how so many men are afraid to flirt with women. Flirting with a girl should be fun and exciting for both parties involved!
Flirting takes a bit of work and practice, but once you’ve learned how to flirt appropriately for your personality, you’ll find your success with women improves astronomically. Here are some tips for beginners on how to flirt.
1. Girls love to flirt.
Women, like men, love attention and being admired. “Flirt” is simply feminine speaking for the masculine term “pick up.” Girls don’t want to be picked up as this makes them feel objectified, whereas the term “flirt” has the connotation of something more fun and playful. Flirting is like little boys’ way of teasing girls to get their attention. Deep down, all women are girls at heart.
2. Flirt to make HER feel good
Most guys start flirting with the expectation that they will succeed in getting a girl’s number or securing a date or some other theoretical measure of success. Try to change your mindset. Say to yourself “I’m flirting with this girl to make her feel good.” Approaching flirting this way will make it more about her and less about you. By doing this, she will pretend you are interested in her and not just getting into her pants.
3. Make flirting fun
Do you remember yelling at a girl on the playground the phrase: “Girls are weak, throw them in the stream. Boys are strong, like King Kong”? The answer is that the girl will chase you down the swings and slippery plunges or worst case scenario she will at least talk to you to defend yourself as to why she is stronger than you and how much little boys suck. It’s exactly the same with flirting, it’s just an adult way of playing fight. What young children do on the playground is the basis of the ‘cocky and fun’ approach to flirting.
4. Start slow and build your confidence
Technology has given us many ways to practice flirting techniques without the need for face-to-face interaction. If you’re a shy guy, this is a good place to start. Online dating sites, text messaging, instant messaging, and chat rooms are ways you can hone your skills on flirting techniques that will work for you. Be sure to be funny and keep your posts short. It’s better to pepper her with short messages that will brighten her day than a long email that she’ll never finish reading.
5. Practice, practice, practice
Make every woman you meet (except your family members!) a person you can practice your flirting skills on. Because you’re now in the mindset that you’re flirting for her benefit, you’ll come off as a fun-to-be-around guy instead of a sleazy one. Practice your cheeky smile, wink, or new line. Gauge your reaction. If a colleague is offended by one of her lines, chances are it’s best to get him out of your flirting game plan.
6. Control the conversation
When you start your flirting career, it is important that you build up your confidence. One way to do this is to make sure that you are the person who ends the conversation. A typical example: you are in line at the supermarket or at the ticket counter and you start flirting with a girl. You pay for your purchases/tickets and it’s time to move on. Deep down you desperately want to ask her for her number. Resist the temptation for the first 20 or so times you start flirting with strangers. What you have to do is say something like “It was great meeting you, but I really have to go.” By doing this, you have controlled the interaction and this will increase your confidence. There is nothing worse than shutting down when you ask for her number or making her leave without saying anything.
So here are some beginner tips for flirting with women. Look out for my other articles on flirting and dating.
