The people you have the most contact with and hang out with will have a positive or negative effect on your self-esteem and confidence levels.
We all know those people who are positive, happy and joyful to be around.
How do they make you feel?
Yes, they make you feel the same! They can bring excitement to a dull atmosphere and they can fill the room with positive vibes that have a ripple effect on everyone else.
We also know those people who could be great “Wendy Whiners.”
They never had the opportunities, they are always putting people down, they don’t like others to be successful, they are jealous and negative thinking. Do I need to continue? They are like crabs in a bucket: they knock down anyone who reaches the top.
These people drain your energy and bring you down to their level, a million miles from the level where YOU want to be operating.
The interesting thing is that many of these trusted sappers are not malicious. Many times they do not realize that they are so negative, and that they are bothering you. Some feel realistic, but we tend to think they are downright pessimistic.
You have to ask yourself a big question: what happens to my level of confidence and optimism when I am inundated with their rainy cloud or judgmental attitude?
It will most likely wear you down and, worse yet, may even adopt your language, mannerisms, and point of view. This scares me!
So what do you need to do to make sure the people you associate with are empowering and supporting what you stand for instead of bringing you down all the time?
1 – You have the power to choose who to hang out with. Ideally, you want happy, vibrant, positive people. Make sure they weigh more than any spoilers.
2 – If you have good friends who are negative and you still want to be with them, make sure to let them know how you feel; if they are real friends, they will respect you for it. If you are negative from time to time, acknowledge that you are and block out the negativity. Some may appreciate you letting them know that they complain too much or the like.
3 – The same can be said of the family. Your more mature relatives have behaviors that have been conditioned for years and years and from different eras. Appreciate where they are coming from and, as in #2 above, pick up and select the information that is filtered through your brain.
4 – Remember, that nothing has meaning in life except the meaning that you give it. Filter everything around you and choose carefully what you want to believe.
I am so convinced on this topic of preserving your self-confidence that I lead a unique training course on confidence building. I’ve also partnered with a wonderful image consultant so we can bring you a new workshop in November. The focus will be on communicating your confidence, inside and out, and teaching us how to walk, talk, act, and dress for success! Stay tuned for the next newsletter for exact details!
My best wishes
